Marriage is a Private Affair by Chinua Achebe (TU-BA I)

 Marriage is a Private Affair by Chinua Achebe

Author’s Bio….

v Chinua Achebe, born on 16 November 1930 & died on 21 March 2013, was a Nigerian novelist, poet, and critic who is regarded as the most dominant figure in modern African literature. He has written:

Ø   Things Fall Apart

Ø   No Longer at Ease

Ø   Arrow of God

Ø   A Man of the People

Ø   Anthills of the Savannah.

v  Achebe sought to escape the colonial perspective that predominated African literature and drew from the traditions of the Igbo people, Christian influences, and the clash of Western and African values to create a uniquely African voice.

v  He received notable awards like the Nigerian National Order of Merit Award in 1979, the St. Louis Literary Award in 1999, the Man Booker International Prize in 2007 & The Dorothy and Lillian Gish Prize in 2010.

Main Characters

1.      Okeke-father

2.      Nnaemeka-Okeke’s son or a boy of Ibo tribe 

3.       Nene-Nnaemeka’s fiancée, the Christian girl and teacher 

 Theme

§  modern and urban cultures

§   rural and traditional cultures

Background

The story takes place in the West African country of Nigeria, a land of great cultural diversity. Centuries-old traditions continue to govern life in Nigerian villages, where parents often play a decisive role in choosing mates for their children.

In the cities, however, modern practices have displaced many of the village traditions, including the role of the parent as a match-maker. The tension between old and new ways of living sometimes creates conflict within families, especially between generations.

Literal Comprehension

The story, Marriage is a Private Affair,  is written by a Nigerian writer Chinua Achebe. In this story, the writer describes how marriage is a personal issue. First comes Love and then comes marriage between Nnaemeka and Nene which is the crux of the story. It is because both the boy and girl seem to be from distinct tribes.

The boy, Nnaemeka, has an engagement with a girl and resumes to live with her in  Lagos city. As they are engaged, Nene is asking to send the message about their engagement to her boyfriend’s father, Okeke, but Nnaemeka doesn’t want that because he knows what nature and culture his father has. In terms of  his culture, the son of the Ibo tribe has to marry the girl of their own tribe not by love but by arranged marriage. When the arrangement happens can accept, such marriage is accepted by all in the neighborhood. However, love and opposite cast marriage can’t accept in his family and society.

In the story, Nnaemeka goes home on leave and tells his father that he could not marry Ugoye because he is in love to with Nene who is a good Christian and teacher in Lagos City.  As Okeke listens this, he becomes furious because in his rituals, Christian, females should not teach. Again,  Okeke knows that the girl is of another tribe not of the Ibo tribe, and he looks silent in a dangerous way. Okeke tries to persuade his son not to marry Nene but the son denies what his father says.  Nnaemeka says he could not marry the girl, Ugoye, whom his father arranges for him. Eventually, his father asks him to leave the house permanently. After that Nnaemeka goes to Lagos, and Okeke's the neighbor visits  Okeke's house and gives him sympathy for his son’s action. They also suggest he go against his son’s behavior and tell to check his son with a witch doctor to rectify his mentality though Okeke does not accept the idea at all.

Nnaemeka shows his father’s letter to Nene after six months because he has sent his photos of the wedding to him. In return, his father makes damages all the pictures of Nene which lot makes Nene cry lots. He consoles her narrating that his father is a good man & one day things will be right. Nene and Nnaemeka spend cozy and happy life in Lagos.

All know that Okeke has entirely forgotten his son in 8 years because he has no contact till date. Nene gives birth to two sons during that period. She also writes a serious letter to Okeke telling that his two grandsons are eager to see their grandfather. When Okeke reads the letter of Nene, he soon realizes his mistake and welcomes all of them cordially regretting his behavior.

Interpretation

This story aims at telling that marriage should be done in terms of our personal interests and preference in order to have a happy life. Pigheaded thinking and  superstitious 

belief can create tension and problems but sooner or later it can be also fixed if the couples have a strong resolution.

As Okeke could not accept his son’s private marriage life with Nene and faced tensions for a long time i.e. 8 years tension, but eventually is able to accept the reality.

Critical Thinking

After reading this story, I  don't agree with the writer because:

Can a private marriage always create happiness?

Can all arranged marriages be  unhappy and boring? Do not agree

How can a cruel grandfather melt his heart by the name of grandsons?

Assimilation

I had a friend who studied in Kathmandu and married to opposite cast girl so that his family didn’t care him for a long time. Years passed, and, he had his children who phoned their grandparents made them feel transfigure positively and welcomed all of them with warm hospitality after 12 years.

 

 

 

 

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